BITCH... Not a Cuss Word!!!

(In the picture is Gaia.)

So I recently learned from my girl K-love that BITCH isn't a cuss word along with all the other names that are used against women!!! (Thank you K-love!) ;)

According to a Pagan paper, the term Bitch isn't horrible. This is what K-love found:

She has been known in ancient times and continuously throughout history even up to the moment by names too numerous to mention. She predates Christianity (who adopted her names, her liturgy, her holidays, her rites, and her place of worship) by thousands of years. Remains of her templates and her images have been found on every continent and in every country the world over. For the last two thousand years, she has been abused, misused, maligned, and cast out by those "in control." Her worshippers have suffered rape, the rack, nail screws, stoning, skewering, stampedes, flaying, quartering's, burning, drowning, disembowelment, and any number of other unmentionable tortures in the quest to rid the world of her influence. Yet she lives on, not in our memories as a quaint fertility object from a distant and barbarous past, but as a living, breathing, regenerating entity upon which all humans reside, She is Gaia, the Great Earth Mother, She is also the triple Goddess: maiden, mother, and crone, or creator, sustainer, and destroyer. She is the virgin and she is the sacred whore, The Goddess is back, and she is seeking retribution for the sins of the fathers and the sins of the sons back seven generations.

To understand the defilement of the Great Mother, we need only to look to the language of our times. As children, we are instructed not to say certain words, because they were "bad words." "Cunt," "bitch" and "whore," are representative of those words. Yet when we investigate their etymology, we find not words of debasement, but words of honor and names of the Great Mother.

Bitch: The Bitch Goddess of antiquity was known in all the Indo-European cultures, beginning with the Great Bitch Sarama, who led the Vedic dogs of death. Artemis-Diana, leader of the Scythian Alani or "hunting dogs," was another such Bitch Goddess. Harlots or "bitches" were identified in the ancient Roman cult of the Goddess Lupa, the Wolf Bitch, whose priestesses (the lupae) gave their name to the prostitutes in general.

I only wanted to point out the word bitch because it's the most used in front of me. Now when someone calls me a bitch, I can say "Thank you! I always wanted to be a Goddess." If they don't get that, I will say, "Bitches are dogs, dogs bark, bark is on trees, and trees are a part of nature, and nature is beautiful, so THANK YOU for the compliment." I hope everyone enjoys this. I know I did when K-love pointed it out. There is more to the article, if anyone wants to read the rest, you should ask me or subscribe to The Beltane Papers: A Journal of Woman Mysteries.

I love being a woman now. That made my life a little less insane.

School... High School vs. College

I'm the kind of girl that will fall asleep in all of my classes and still learn everything I need to learn in that class. I have done it many times, and still continue to do it.

(Student in the picture isn't me.)

Every morning that I go to my classes, I tend to fall asleep in my first class. At least everyone else laughs about it. I never get in trouble either. My teacher just lets me do it. He doesn't care at all.

Can you imagine a blonde sitting next to you at a blonde at a table and she is falling asleep?

Well, that is me. I wish I was kidding, but I'm not.

After classes, I am found texting and messing around on the computer. I am just a typical teen. The only thing is, I can't believe that I feel so rushed with school right now!

I am a Running Start student full time. So, I get to go to college instead of put up with the dramatic high schools. (SO happy to be away from it!) I never like high school. I found it was only needed for those who want to socialize only and make others feel bad. I know, I am blonde and could be a cheerleader, but I gave it all up to be where I am now.

College has saved me from everything. High school sucks where I live. I would rather jump off a cliff. I love hanging with older people in classes too. They all know my age cause I act it. lolz. Of course, I try to stay very busy, and it tends to bite me in the ass sometimes. I like talking to everyone in my classes because I am told that I am really friendly for being a gothic chick. (Yes, I am goth.)

High school was hard on me. I had hardly any friends and moving to a new place every time I started liking a place got hard. Students in high school are not very welcoming. Each time I walked in, they just laughed including the goth people there too. No one had anything to do with me.

Now that I am in college, I am constantly talking to people and calling them friends. People are more accepting there. More willing to get along. LESS DRAMA! Things are easier on me here.

Now for my grades. I am a 3.8 gpa student in college right now. I am really good at all my classes and get along with each professor. They all listen when I talk and treat me as an equal. Since I work hard for my grades, I get respected for what I do.

My grades in high school were high too, but the teachers HATED me. I was the girl in the back speaking my opinion. All my teachers found me challenging. I even had one teacher yell at me because I wear only black. She sent me to the office, and I had the principal laughing his ass off. Him and I saw it as ridiculous.

So, I may still be the girl sleeping in class, but I am rushing through my education. Somehow I am staying sane through in all too. At least no more high school for me. Sorry for those still suffering though it.

Rape.... From Someone So Close

So, I am from Dramatown. The thing is about that place, most of the drama known isn't as bad as the drama behind the closed doors.

I was 11 when the first time happened. At that point I had no mother with me. It was just my dad and I. I know it isn't pleasant. But I was scared one night and I needed to sleep in the same room as my dad. Just so everyone knows, I developed everything at the age of 10. I was very young and maturing very fast. Little did I realize it was going to end up the worst thing that happened to me.

I curled in bed with my dad cause I was crying about my mother. I laid next to him and it was the first time he took advantage of me. I didn't know what was happening. I just let it happen cause I didn't know it was wrong. I was young and didn't know better. My parents never told me about sex at that point. I personally think my father planned it that way.

Living in a small town was unhelpful. I was the quiet little girl in the corner with a rich daddy. Everyone made sure they were nice to me, but I was always silent. I never liked talking except to my best friend. Even she didn't know what was going on with me.

I was 13 when I finally figured out everything because of the news. I asked my grandmother what everything was and she was very honest. I had no questions after that. I knew that my dad could be put in jail for what he did, but that was only if I spoke up.

I didn't speak up. It continued to happen until he remarried. Of course, he stopped after that cause he had a hooker as a wife. She was perfect for him. The good news is, I got away from him right after I learned what he did. He also then became abusive, but that's another story. I may have never spoken up, but I think living my life now is worth it as long as I'm away from him.

~Welcome to My Rushed Insanity! ~